America and most of the civilized world have a fascination with health and beauty. When was the last time you saw a billboard or a television commercial featuring a fat, ugly person? For those of us not blessed with an attractive countenance, these can be very trying times. I’ve had this problem for years. In fact, when I was born they called in a vet. My mother was caught two days later in the nursery trying to switch my ID bracelet with that of another child. As I was growing up, she tried the old trick of tying a pork chop around my neck so the dogs would play with me. The dogs preferred to dig for turnips in the garden instead. When my sight started failing in grammar school and I had to get glasses, that didn’t help my looks much either. My classmates always called me “D.U.”
That stood for “double ugly.” “Beauty is only skin deep,” I would argue. “Yeah,” they would reply, “but ugly goes clear to the bone.” In the seventh grade we had a Halloween masquerade party at school. The scariest costumes were awarded prizes. The kid who placed first went as me.
1. The purpose of the selection is to
a. persuade.
b. inform.
c. entertain.
2. The author’s tone is
a. humorous.
b. formal.
c. indignant.
3. As used in the selection, countenance most nearly means
a. visual.
b. appearance.
c. characteristic.
4. The author’s bias leans toward
a. beautiful people.
b. ugly people.
c. children in costumes.
5. We can infer from the selection that the writer
a. was hurt by the comments made about his physical appearance.
b. ignored the children who made mean comments.
c. told his mother about the children who made fun of him.
1. c.
2. a.
3. b.
4. b.
5. a.
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