INSTRUCTIONS: Edit the following paragraphs for consistent point of view only. Using the first sentence as the basis for the point of view, change the rest of the paragraph to maintain a consistent point of view. Do not edit for any other kinds of changes. Three teenagers, two brothers and one sister, from Bloomington, Indiana, realized that if they worked hard and used ingenuity they could build

Question

a successful business. I kept in mind that customers wanted excellent service as well as honest dealings. Of course, you also realized that the key to success started with the realization that a service was needed in an area, and then I went out and aggressively tackled the problem. These college students, who lived just ten miles from Lake Monroe, a resort area, found no pizza parlors near by, so I decided to "zero in" on the opportunity, and I started my own business. I found an old, abandoned building that you could obtain at a reasonable price. With little overhead, I added an attractive deck in front, tables, and chairs. I then purchased used kitchen equipment that produced excellent pizzas. When customers came in, they received exceptional service; therefore, business grew. This is but one example of individuals starting a successful business in the Twenty-first Century.

What will be an ideal response?

Answer 1

(Words that need to be changed are in boldface.)

Three teenagers, two brothers and one sister, from Bloomington, Indiana, realized that if they worked hard and used ingenuity they could build a successful business. They kept in mind that customers wanted excellent service as well as honest dealings. Of course, they also realized that the key to success started with the realization that a service was needed in an area, and then they went out and aggressively tackled the problem. These college students, who lived just ten miles from Lake Monroe, a resort area, found no pizza parlors near by, so they decided to "zero in" on the opportunity, and they started their own business. They found an old, abandoned building that they could obtain at a reasonable price. With little overhead, they added an attractive deck in front, tables, and chairs. They then purchased used kitchen equipment that produced excellent pizzas. When customers came in, they received exceptional service; therefore, business grew. This is but one example of individuals starting a successful business in the Twenty-first Century.